British news outlets and particularly some newspapers of a certain kind have been praising the newly married prince William and his new wife Kate; future Queen and duchess of Cambridge, not unusual I hear you say considering the tsunami of delirious toadying which greeted their wedding. Well the dust is now settling and they are about to embark on the particularly arduous task of visiting Canada and the USA, a task made more gruelling when one considers that they will tackle this onerous trip assisted by a niggardly retinue of seven, you read that right; a measly team of no doubt dutiful assistants numbering only seven, I tell you they will be sending tiny innocent children up chimneys next.
William's dad Charles has an entourage of 150 including a man who squeezes his tooth paste on to the brush for him, this gives us pause for thought surely? How can he regularly make such an a**e of himself when he has 150 minders? How many does big Phil have I wonder? The duchess will not have a personal assistant with her; that's the woman who valiantly collects all the bouquets she is given by the idiots who line the route where she will walk, it's a tough gig right enough but, she will at least quite rightly have her personal hairdresser with her, some people are simply indispensible it would seem, perhaps there are no hairdressers in Canada or America who are up to scratch, have they considered such an insult against our colonial hairdresser friends might cause a diplomatic rammy?
Is it possible that you dear reader are thinking like me; what the hell do the other 5 of the team do; and; is this the thin end of the wedge? Personally I don't think that "The Firm" will stand for such 'cut backs' is it possible I wonder that the Royals are showing empathy with those who are suffering cut backs around the country? Of course they know about the cut backs being made, how dare you!
I fancy the future King William is showing his more realistic side as a modern day Royal by sharing our pain and metaphorically saying "if you old chap are losing your job, your house and your pension then it's the least we can do to jolly well cut our entourage back to seven" it makes you proud to be British does it not, proud to be part of Dave's 'Big Society' it's an Idea whose time has come, an idea that 'armies cannot stand against' to misquote Leon Trotsky, all together now with gusto "long to rein over us – an egg between four ae us – thank f**k there's no more ae us, God save the Queen"
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