Following the Dunblane mass murder the wee shyster Salmond struck with indecent haste to get himself on the TV to share his grief with the people, and of course he made sure that he was first to call for a ban on guns. Not all guns of course nor did he know what guns should be banned but he was first that was what mattered. He also latched on to the case of the 3 broken-hearted wives of the fishermen whose boat sank with them on board, he made it his personal crusade to raise that boat, he apparently was convinced against his better judgement that he should not claim that he would bring the men back to life but he took some convincing. The other sea graves, oh yes! there are hundreds in the same circumstances; were ignored, you see the others unfortunately did not have 3 distraught grieving widows who were running a high profile campaign to have the boat recovered, that's just tough luck for the others, strike while the iron is hot said wee Eck. When he was rumbled and embarrassed at taking a wage from Holyrood and Westminster at the same time he vowed to bestow one of the wages on good causes. Then; with rat like cunning he 'found an angle' and came up with an idea for a good causes foundation. It's name? Well; how about "The Mary Salmond Foundation" I kid you not; he made certain that if he was to do something good then the world would hear about it. Hence the idea to exploit his late mother's name, now every time the foundation does good he gets the credit, what a guy, what a super Scotsman, what a low life Del Boy Shyster. As Billy Connolly once said about that other Scottish thug, union buster and capitalist hero Andrew Carnegie "he gave money away as quietly as a waiter falling down a flight of stairs with a full tray of glasses"
Today we hear it trumpeted that he is to "boycott" the open golf at Muirfield in Ayrshire because it is a male only preserve. The most entrenched section of voters against independence it turns out are women; now, call me an old sceptic but could there be a link, would anyone honestly sink that low? Read the first paragraph again please. The story emerged that the snp Scottish Government led by wee Eck (the spiv) would not darken the doors of the offending Muirfield dinosaur park but, there's always a but isn't there. It turns out that they will send a representative in his place similar to a colonial governor if you will to be a symbol of "his eckness" so they will not in reality be boycotting anything, just kind of boycotting it, so as not to cause any offence to anyone ken?
The great leader emphasises his personal sacrifice by telling the world that his devotion to golf is such that he has attended every open championship in Scotland for 40 years and, wait for it, in another exhibition of the famous Salmond hubris he forgot that more than a few of those tournaments have been at Muirfield. Take 40 years away from my own 64 years and I am 24 and I remember at that age campaigning for female equality and women's rights including a 2 month strike which I was proud to help to lead so he can hardly claim that when he was there these things were not important.
In a final piece of delicious irony which completely buries any integrity he might have had Mr. Tom English of the Scotsman newspaper offers a column today headed up by a photo. of the dashing first minister driving out of the rough on a rather splendid golf course named The Royal St. George's Golf Course in the beautiful English County of Kent from where he wrote to "congratulate" the snp supporting Ayrshire couple who won £161 million on a lottery. That golf course he was playing only 2 years ago was guess what? I think you might be ahead of me by now; it was a famous fortress of the male only variety, a proud sexist establishment.
Would you Adam n Eve it? You could not make it up could you? Has any politician ever shown such arrogance? Has any politician ever shown such contempt for the electorate? Has any politician ever treated women with such patronising disdain? Ladies and gentlemen I give you wee Eck the first minister of Scotland and, catch this one; he wants to rule an independent Scotland where his word will be law. Be careful when you vote.